soccer. CHECK!

We had our last soccer game on Saturday. We had pizza afterward and handed out trophies. I put my BAMF SUV in 4WD and did donuts all over that field … and then I peeled out and burnt rubber all over that parking lot. Ok, not really, but I could have if I wanted to. Not to put the rest of the season to shame, we of course had one last grand finale parental episode. There we all were enjoying the tasty pizza with a bunch of hooligan 9/10 year olds.. and then all of a sudden, the fuzz was there – the coppers – the 5-0 -the po po! You know, the police. So, Coach Knitpho goes to find out the scoop, but because we’re such goody goody’s, it had nothing to do with us. But indeed had to do with one of the parents who belonged to one of our players.

But wait – let me paint the picture of this parent for you and his kids. First off, my darling daughter told the parents on Day 1 of soccer that his daughter was very scary looking and looked very angry. (funny and true! but I told her that wasn’t very nice!) This particular baby has a furrowed brow and dirt constantly ALL OVER her face. Hair a gnarled mess of ickyness. Every. single.time. we .see. her. Anyway, this little girl is walking all over the place and the dad (only the dad, because the mom told me at the beginning of the year that she “wanted nothing to do with soccer, this was the dads idea!”) is never watching her. I’ve seen her walk across the soccer field, mid-game.. I’ve seen her take oranges from the other teams bowl, I’ve seen her walk through the parking lot. Unattended..and parents totally unaware of her where-abouts. So I am one of those people who (i like to think anyway) is constantly aware of my surrounding. I try to watch everything around me and my brain is constantly racing of what would I do if a certain situation would arise. My brain never stops.. I make myself laugh quite often, and I’m sure I’ll be put into a mental institution before too long… once the voices start talking – it’s hard to silence the chatter. But Saturday.. while the scary baby was being a total menace, while the dad was yelling crazy things from the sideline, I went back to the parking lot, and there she was – walking side by side with me and Miss M. I turned her around and told her head on back. But, at one point again, I saw her in the parking lot and then the dad running to get her. (shocker!) So ok, now- back to the POLICE! .. come to find out.. crazy serial killer dad (thats what we labeled him!) had ANOTHER BABY with him.. where was this other baby. IN THE FREAKIN’ CAR! NAPPING! FOR OVER 50MINUTES! Someone called in the law. 2 cars. 4 cops. This was serious. By this time the baby was out of the car in her ‘loving’ dads arms..and I guess all ended fine, because the left fairly quick. But the WHOLE time he was talking to the police, I guess he figured everyone else was in charge of the scary baby. Where was she? STEPPING ALL OVER THE PIZZAS! (lids were closed, but still!) So, thats when I started imagining myself putting the beast into 4WD and just tearing up that field.. but instead I just left. Exhausted. Came home, when I really wanted to go out and see my knitting peeps and drink some draft Stella goodness, but I just couldn’t function.
Then today.. I went to get the man in my life Egg McMuffins from McDs. Thats what he wanted, ok! So, I went and ordered and came back. MY EFFING ORDER WAS EFFING WRONG. Oh , all the stuff was there.. just NOT WHAT I ORDERED! So, I started stuffing the biscuits back in the bag and throwing shit around. Stupid McDonalds.. I’m putting a curse on you. I even went back, and you know what.. the receipt was right, they said I placed the order wrong. MORONS! So, that did not start my day off good.. atleast Mr. Knitpho got his McMuffins.. that’s all that mattered. But come the hell on McD’s.. is it THAT hard? Really?

So, all in all .. a pretty fantastic weekend. Mr. Knitpho had a loverly fathers day, he & the boy attended a Worcester Tornadoes game and anything baseball.. my man loves. Now, we’re in the midst of the Celtics game and praying for a game 4 win.

I thought I would have a FO for you – but NOOOOOOOOO. I’m dumb and can’t figure out the pattern, but what’s new, right.

TTFN